


What's Left of Her & More

by MamaCesa



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drabble, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, No imprint, Oneshot, barely edited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:54:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29317437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MamaCesa/pseuds/MamaCesa
Summary: AU where Carlisle was there to help Bella give birth and Jacob doesn't imprint on Renesmee.Carlisle takes Renesmee and cleans her up while Edward does his venom thing and Jacob does his keeping Bella's heart beating thing. Literally nothing changes in that except-
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	What's Left of Her & More

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea what this is. I just needed to write it.

Jacob gives up. Bella's dead. He goes downstairs to kill that thing. His heart was pounding in time with each thought. He needed to destroy it. The thing that no one sees for what it really is. It's not a baby. It's not a person. They really thought Bella was so expendable? They had all fallen victims to it’s manipulation. 

He slowly walks up to where it is. Blondie is cooing at it. Of course, she probably wanted to play Mom the most. Esme is sitting next to her. She is holding some sort of metal container. Jacob pauses. He doesn't want to hurt Esme too.

Carlisle comes from behind him holding a pouch of blood. Human blood that was meant to save lives, not feed a demon. He eyes Jacob's face with a hint of suspicion.

"She's going to be okay, Jacob." Ugh, why did he have to sound so sure? Doctors are always smug about that stuff, Jacob thought angrily.

But Carlisle isn't smug. He seems to genuinely think Bella will make it. "Edward has her. She'll pull through for him, if not anyone else."

Even with Bella dead, Jacob's heart stings. He reluctantly pulls his eyes away from the women cooing at what looks like a pile of blankets. He’s torn. Helplessly he looks back to Carlisle, unsure of what he needs to do. Carlisle's eyes are dark as night, but they still hold the same kindness that he always showed.

Jacob deflates. Once again he knows he can't hurt Carlisle. He falls to his knees as he can't stand anymore. Tears that burn like acid fall to the floor without his consent. "It's not fair!" he cries out. His voice roars out a cry that’s filled with months of grief from every time he’s lost Bella.

Carlisle walks a few steps to hand Esme that blood. Jacob knows he’s alone. So he’s surprised when suddenly ice cold hands that burn grip him under his arms to help him stand up. "Let's take a walk."

Carlisle doesn't have to walk with him. There is a new thing in the world that just killed his daughter in law, a small part in Jacob's mind tells him. The part feels so far away it's screams are nothing but a whisper.

Seth tries to approach them, but when they look into each other's eyes he backs off. Jacob wonders what he looks like to the young wolf.

Carlisle and him just walk down a path behind the house. Jacob stays quiet, scared that he’ll make that awful sound again, while Carlisle speaks to him gently. His mind feels like it’s filling up with cotton, but the doc speaks in a way that still gets through to him.

"I know you want to kill her, Jacob, but do you think you can kill something that is so much like Bella? Are you capable of that?" Why isn’t Carlisle accusing him? Why isn’t he mad? 

"It's not Bella..." Jacob hears himself respond. Why is he whispering? He’s supposed to be shouting.

"You're right, my apologies." Carlisle stops walking. He turns to face Jacob. "I got a good look at her. She's extraordinary. More human than vampire from what I was able to tell."

There are no words. The cotton had filled him up too much. Bella is dead. There’s no human to be passed down anymore.

He just lets Carlisle talk. He can't stand anymore, though, so he just sits on the ground in defeat. He doesn’t care that his shorts are now covered in mud.

Then, to his surprise, Carlisle sits in the mud with him.

He grins when Jacob looks baffled. "Don't tell Alice," he winks. The playful mood leaves as soon as it comes. "I won't tell you to leave. I won't tell you to let go of your anger. You still have a place with us as long as you need it. I just have one request."

Request. Just like Bella requested and begged for Jacob to stay? "What?" The part of him that’s far away is angry at the audacity that he’s being asked to give more. Doesn’t Carlisle see how empty Jacob is?

"Just look at her. Try to see her now that she's outside of Bella."

"You know I can't do that," Jacob chokes out. Hot tears blur his vision again, along with that familiar anger that had been with him for what now felt like forever. "It killed her."

"We don't know for sure." Carlisle replies calmly.

Jacob shoots up. "No!"

Carlisle just looks up at him. He doesn't stand up. Why won't he stand up too?

"So you'd go against what Bella wants? If she does die, will disrespect her wishes like that?"

"No! I won't kill it yet," Jacob knows as he speaks that he won't go through with it. He probably wasn’t ever going to. "But I'll be damned if I look at that thing! It’s evil."

\----

Jacob wasn't that surprised that Bella pulled through after all.  _ For now _ , that distant part told him,  _ her heart will stop beating again _ .

He still hadn't looked at Renesmee. Seriously, that was its name? It was a truly awful name. Probably fitting, considering how awful it was for killing its own mother. 

Everyone was wrapped around it’s fingers. Even Alice had pulled through. Everyone had kissed it goodbye probably twenty times each before they left to go hunt. 

Jacob hadn't turned back into a wolf yet to go talk to Sam. He didn't know why. It was like he knew if he phased that he wouldn't be able to come back, and he wanted to wait to see what would happen to Bella. Even with her turning into a monster he still seemed unable to let her go.

Leah and Seth were handling things okay. Seth was giving him updates on the hourly, even if there wasn’t much to report. Though it quickly became apparent that he was just looking for excuses to say hi to the ‘baby’. 

Seth and Carlisle came into the living room. Carlisle was holding Renesmee. The doctor looked like he was more of a dad than he actually was. Jacob guessed it made sense. He looked too young to be a dad to all these ‘teenagers’. 

Carlisle sat next to him on the couch. Jacob automatically looked away from Renesmee. He didn’t need to look at it to know about it. He heard the doc and the others talking about it. He knew it had a heartbeat. He knew it was growing quicker than normal. He knew all about its ability to touch someone and share it’s thoughts. 

What a twisted version of mind control, Jacob thought. 

“Jake, you sure you don’t wanna see her?” Seth asked for the hundredth time. “She’s beautiful.” 

“It’s okay, Seth.” Carlisle told him gently. “Jacob needs time. This is very hard for him.” 

Bella’s heart upstairs skipped a beat. Jacob listened for any shuffling. Still nothing. She hadn’t moved at all. If it weren’t for her fighting heartbeat, Jacob would have thought she really did die from how still she’d been. 

Carlisle sighed. “I’m going to check on Bella. Seth, do you mind?” 

“Nope! Come here, baby.” Seth’s voice raised in pitch. He was using a stupid voice that adults used to talk to babies and puppies. “Hi, Renesmee. How are you? Huh? You feeling ready for a nap?” 

“Ugh, Seth, can’t you take that to another room? I’m trying to watch TV.” He was lying. The only thing on TV was some stupid baking show. 

Seth’s grin didn’t waver. “Good. I wanted to show the baby TV too…” 

“There are a million other TVs, Seth!” Jacob snapped. Why was he being more annoying than usual? 

The thing in Seth’s arm squawked. He heard a sniffle, then after a beat, suddenly it started crying. 

“Oh, no no Renesmee, don’t cry!” Seth worried. He switched back to his baby voice. “Wanna do some bounces?” Seth started bouncing up and down on his toes. 

Seth started walking back and forth while the thing’s cries grew louder. “Uhh, Jake?” 

Jacob stood up. The cries were pounding against his entire body. He felt his fists starting to quiver. He was tempted to just leave early if this is what was going to happen. “What?!” 

“She wants you,” Seth told him. Jacob, with no control over his eyes, looked to see a white hand pressing against Seth’s cheek. The cries were repeating, sounding like whimpers. 

“Ah, ah, aaaah!”

Jacob, bewildered, looked further down to see Renesmee’s face for the first time. 

She was bigger than he expected. He had heard everyone whispering about her fast growth rate. He still wasn’t prepared. She was round. Her face was growing redder while tears rolled down her cheeks. Her small mouth was open to show teeth! Like, a full kid’s set. She was wearing a little blue baby dress. She opened her eyes to suck in another breath and Jacob let out a noise that was foreign to his ears. 

She had Bella’s eyes. 

She must have been as shocked as he was that he was finally looking at her. Her shouts wore down to hiccups. Without warning, she turned her body to reach out towards Jacob. Seth looked like he was about to lose hold, and without thinking Jacob reached out to stop her from falling. 

She was warm! Nearly the same temperature as him. Jacob’s thoughts were too jumbled to make sense. Like he wasn’t thinking in words, but in foreign images. For a moment he thought he saw his own face, but there was an expression he had never seen before, like a mixture of awe and sadness. 

“What’s she showing you?” Carlisle asked from behind him. Jacob jumped, and suddenly fully had Renesmee in his arms. How had he not heard the doc come down the stairs? 

“Show- showing me?” Jacob asked. He looked down at Renesmee to see that she was resting her small hand on his shoulder. She was smiling, though there were still tears staining her face. At least she wasn’t sniffling or hiccupping anymore. 

Jacob slowly reached his hand toward her face. He felt, more than heard, Carlisle and Seth suck in a breath. Tentatively he used the back of his index finger to wipe the wetness off of her cheek. Her skin was soft. She looked adoringly at him. Like she had found a shiny new toy. No, it was more than that. 

The smile on her face was the same smile Bella had whenever she’d see him. 

It was too much, but not enough. He hugged her to his chest. This wasn’t an evil demon. This was Bella’s daughter. This baby in his arms was the last remaining piece of Bella’s humanity. She was an entirely new piece to the puzzle that seemed to fit into their crazy life. She was Bella, she was herself. She was just a child.

He looked up to see Carlisle grinning at him. 

“She’s just a baby!” He let out a laugh, which turned into sobs. “I don’t- What-” he couldn’t complete his sentences. 

He saw an image of his crying face suddenly, tinged with curiosity that wasn’t his. He looked down to see the baby’s eyebrows crinkled. She looked just like Bella when she would worry about him. Her brown eyes were wide with innocent curiosity, so untainted with the worries of the storm around her. 

“I think I’m okay.” He told her, not sure how well she understood. 

Carlisle reached for Renesmee. “I have to measure her again.” 

Jacob was surprised to feel that he was reluctant to give her over. Though she made the decision for him by rolling over to reach for Carlisle. She did glance back at him once more before she left.

Carlisle took her promptly. He smiled down at her, then looked up again at Jacob. “How are you?” 

Jacob shook his head. The cotton feeling was dissipating until all that was left was raw confusion mixed with deep awe. “I don’t know.” He didn’t know. Everything was changed even though nothing was different. 

“That’s okay, Jake,” Seth piped in. He patted Jacob’s shoulder. “She has that effect on people.” 

So she does, Jacob thought. “So she does,” he echoed his thoughts out loud. 


End file.
